I am a thinking animal.  I was sitting at the desk in my Upland,

California home around 1980.  I was studying Introduction to Objectivist

Epistemology by Ayn Rand.  Suddenly, I got it.  I got the answer to this

question that I had been asking since I was a small boy.  It is a simple little

question, but it took the first twenty-five years of my life to understand.

      One of my first memories is being alone on a moving bulldozer, yelling at

my father to hurry and close the gate that we had just passed through.  He still

had to run, jump up, push the pedal, and pull the lever to save me from falling

into the ditch.  He always made it just in time with a big laugh at how afraid I

was.

      My dad could do everything.  He went to college on a basketball

scholarship; joined the Army and liberated the prisoners that were being held by

the National Socialists in the Dachau, Germany concentration camp; taught animal

husbandry at the University of Alaska; and built a three stall milking parlor on

our dairy farm.

      My dad also could answer my little question.  He told me that I was

created by God.  When I asked him who created God, I did not understand his

reply.  I felt bad for asking because my father became uncomfortable.  Years

later I realized that my father had created God by believing.  My dad wanted

someone to save him when he became frightened.  While this belief did trigger a

pleasant emotion for my father, it would be up to me to discover the real answer

to my question.

      Charles Darwin, about a century ago, wrote On the Origin of Species.  He

recorded his observations as the naturalist aboard the Beagle, a commercial ship

navigating the waters around South America.  He explained that I am an animal

who has evolved from a more primitive life form through natural selection.  This

process has been occurring on the earth for billions of years.  While this

thought is true based on what I have seen, accepting it also triggers a pleasant

emotion.  I feel that I am part of the universe, and I do not feel bad for

asking questions.

      To discover what makes me different from other animals, I had to turn to

epistemology.  This is the study of how we think.  We share emotions with the

other animals, but the day we form our first thought, we leave all the other

organisms behind.

      Sitting at my desk, I had come to the end of a long journey.  Just like

Johnny grouping his toys, I mentally grouped myself with the other supreme

beings called humans, whose distinguishing characteristic is a mind, this

wonderful brain capable of understanding the world.  A new journey began that

day—deciding what to do with my life.  But before I could know what to do, I had

to answer a simple little question:  What am I?  I am a thinking animal.